My Mind

i think i pushed my poor liver into overtime this weekend. i got trashed friday afternoon, then woke up just fine, thanking god i didn't have a killer hangover. so what  do i do? go to my first rugby game, which i absolutely love! and no rugby game would be complete with out a good old ruby party at the rugby house. (which got busted 2 or 3 times. alot of the night is a haze). it was the best, and you meet the nicest guys. granted the majority of guys who come up and talk to you are trying to figure out how difficult it would be to get in your pants, but still, good times. i got drunk off beer for the first time, which oddly enough i find much easier to than off of liquor. but i think its b/c im not used to it. who knows.

i also, lucky me, got to talking with a guy thats also an RA , mark,in my exs dorm, and we have a great thing in common, we both highly dislike him. i found out that when he told me he was talking to Katie, he lied, it was Hollie. he "stole" her away from her ex,  mark's friend. and told everyone we were broke up the whole time. which wasnt true. so he already had her lined up when he broke up with me. i've blocked him from face book, so i cant see him and he cant see me, hes called me twice,, and i still haven't called him back, so im hoping he's gonna get the point. and part of me wants to call him up and tell him to stop calling me , that i am so fucking pissed with him its not even funny, and that no i dont hate him, just despise him. and to tell him that he is ruining this whole semester for me. but then i dont want to give him the statisfaction of knowing he still has so much power over me. and dani keeps telling me that she'll call him and tell him to stop calling me, and see if that would work. i just want to know why he feels the urge to call.

then last night i reliezed how much me and jessie are alike. gabe called and said that he needed her to come over, and she went. and part of me knows where shes coming from , that s a hard situation to be in ya know. its tragic.

why is it that all guys here want to do is get in your fucking pants , and when you dont let them thats all there is, and if you do let them, thats all there is. i think i just want to turn into a icy bitch, who lets no one in or near, mabey then i could protect my heart. who knows

tata for now